Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
