ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Randomize
