:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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