I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
