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• (573): View more from Missouri

  The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k

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  These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.

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  These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism

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• (212): View more from New York

  be right there i have to get my cape

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins

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