if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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