I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
