i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
