I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
