Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize
