I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
