She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
My vagina is officially offended.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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