Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
