therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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