Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I am naked and annoyed.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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