Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I stole a fireplace last night.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
