This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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