I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
