i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
