You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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