i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I am spending my child support on dildos
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize