before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
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