She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
