He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize