That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
