one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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