i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize