He is such a slut. More and more my type.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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