I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
