I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize
