its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
You are the jesus of drinking
I need water and some morals
Randomize
