That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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