Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
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