plz talk dirty to me
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
