it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize
