These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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