I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
