She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize