I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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