He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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