The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
