and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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