we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize