Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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