CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I didn't notice because vodka
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
