walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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