She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Randomize
