sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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