If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
