false alarm. still invincible.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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